Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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