do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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