I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Randomize
