so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
