Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
