I wanna passion pit in your ass
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
