We named our party play list daddy issues
handjob tips. give me some.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
