Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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