dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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