alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
