So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
