I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
