i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
my being single is dangerous.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
