he puts the penis in happiness.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
