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you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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