i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
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