I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
