Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She's like a pop up book from hell.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize