Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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