I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
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