it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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