Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
