I swear she didn't look like that last week.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Randomize
