Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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