id be glad to
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
only you would photoshop your dick
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
