Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Randomize
