You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
