apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
