if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
