David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Vodka?
Forever.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
