I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
