He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
The feeling are messing with the penis
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
