We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
