I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
