So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
