i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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