I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
