There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize
