im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
