I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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