You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
