She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
where does the pee come out of this thing
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize