How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
