Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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