If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
