i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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