Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
17 year olds will be the death of me.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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