that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
