Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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