I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You can't just leave with hair like that
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I touched a dick in church today
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
